Showing posts with label medication. Show all posts
Showing posts with label medication. Show all posts

Saturday, April 15, 2017

Growing up different… not just for kids

Growing up different I was more than familiar to what bullying was. I think the things that surprised me most about the practice of bullying is that 1. Children...sweet, innocent, new to this world, fresh faced little cherub, light of our eyes children … are complete assholes; and 2. Bullys don't go away. They just grow up and become bullying adults.

Now that I am adult my “different” has increased ever more so and I find times that I am still getting bullied by both kids and adults. But fuck them, I learned to blow it off years ago….Bullshit. It still hurts. I've just learned to suppress it. But this response isn't about me. I work with mentally ill adults and since doing so have noticed the bullying trend not just from people on the outside of the spectrum making fun of the mentally ill, but that the Mentally ill themselves are starting to bully each other more frequently. They are looking for and finding differences amongst each other to create an imaginary platform to elevate some against others.

I've seen bullying between…
Mentally Ill and Intellectually deficit…
People who have put themselves in the Mental Health System vs. Court ordered to be here…
Court ordered violent offenders vs. Non-violent offenders…
Diagnosis vs Different diagnosis…
People born with their illness vs. those whose illness was caused by head trauma….

and it goes on and on and on. So...why? If we are all in the same place, if we are all dealing with the stigmatism of mental illness, if we have all been down into the worst of ourselves, how can we not recognize the human need to act as a collective and see ourselves and our struggle in others and raise up to offer support to those that have been there. So, based recently on an indecent at my work, I was asked to give a response to our residents about bullying. Afterword’s, as I went to delete the file, I decided to instead post it to this blog in the hopes that maybe it will help someone, out in the interwebs, where it is often hard for people to get away from bullying, who may need it. 

Always remember talk to someone if you are in need. I have included a few hotline numbers at the end of this post for quick reference. Never forget you unique, you are beautiful, you are loved.

                                                                                                                  

Offering support
Response to bullying within the community

As we grow we find that life is often harder than we expected, especially when you live life with a form of mental illness. According to NAMI statistics, approximately 1 in 5 adults in the U.S. (which is 43.8 million or 18.5%) experience a form of mental illness. There are a lot of us in the world, yet we still feel so alone.

Sometimes there is safety in numbers…

The positive thing about having so many experiencing some form of mental illness is that, even though we are all different and have different journeys, we can still offer support to each other. Everyone, at one point in time, knows what it feels like to suffer through their illness, and sometimes having someone just shake your hand or pat you on the back and tell you “you got this” can help.

Everyone of us walk a different path, even if you have the same diagnosis as someone else, your stories are not the same. There could be two people, twins, with the same diagnosis but show different symptoms and require different medications. Some people’s symptoms range from mild to severe and can often times vary within a few days. That can make daily life hard. That's why I try and talk to you about your medications so often. If your meds are not working for you, THAT IS NOT YOUR FAULT. You won't get in trouble for something you can't help. Not all medications help everybody and can sometimes, even cause more side effects than they are worth.

A lot of people are afraid to talk to their doctor and admit that they are still experiencing/displaying symptoms of their illness. Instead of going through a med change. Why would you want to take something that doesn't work? Having your medications adjusted is not a failure.

I often hear people brag that they only have to take 2 pills while others take 18. If what you are taking is working and allowing you to be the best you possible, what does it matter if you are taking 5 pills instead of 2? Taking several medications does not make you a failure.

We are all here and we have all had to go through periods of adjustments, so if you see your friend, neighbor or roommate going through something, offer them the support you wish someone would have offered you when you needed it. Offer them the respect they deserve and the encouragement to stay strong.

Living with mental illness is a journey that can be hard but we don't have to make it hard on each other. And every one of us is a work in progress, just because you may need a little extra support doesn't mean that you are not going to be a great success, it just means that you have to make it through and when you do, you will know how to offer support to the next one in need.

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Bullys exist everywhere, not just in the Mental Illness community. If you need someone to talk to, to help you through times of doubt regardless of situation here are a few resources. Remember no matter how lonely you feel, YOU   ARE   NOT  ALONE!

§  Adolescent Suicide Hotline: 1-800-621-4000
§  Adolescent Crisis Intervention & Counseling: 1-800-999-9999
§  AIDS National Hotline: 1-800-342-2437
§  CHADD – Children & Adults with Attention Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorders: 1-800-233-4050
§  Child Abuse Hotline: 1-800-4-A-CHILD  (4-2-24453)
§  Cocaine Help line: 1-800-COCAINE (1-800-262-2463)
§  Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-7233
§  Drug & Alcohol Treatment Hotline: 1-800-662-HELP (4357)
§  Ecstasy Addiction: 1-800-468-6933
§  Eating Disorders: 1-888-236-1188
§  Family Violence Prevention Center: 1-800-313-1310
§  Gay & Lesbian National Hotline: 1-888-THE-GLNH (1-888-843-4564)
§  Gay & Lesbian Trevor HelpLine Suicide Prevention: 1-800-850-8078
§  Healing Woman Foundation (Abuse): 1-800-477-4111
§  Help Finding a Therapist: 1-800-THERAPIST (1-800-843-7274)
§  Incest Awareness Foundation: 1-888-547-3222
§  National Center For Learning Disabilities: 1-888-575-7373
§  Missing & Exploited Children Hotline: 1-800-843-5678
§  National Allianceon Mental Illness (NAMI): 1-800-950-NAMI (6264)
§  Panic Disorder Information Hotline: 1-800-64-PANIC (72642)
§  Post Abortion Trauma: 1-800-593-2273
§  Project Inform HIV/AIDS Treatment Hotline: 1-800-822-7422
§  Rape (People Against Rape): 1-800-877-7252
§  Rape, Abuse, Incest, National Network (RAINN): 1-800-656-HOPE (1-800-656-4673)
§  Runaway Hotline: 1-800-621-4000
§  Self Injury (Information only. This is not a crisis line, info/referrals only): 1-800-DONT-CUT (1-800-366-8288
§  Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-4673
§  Sexual Abuse – Stop It Now!: 1-888-PREVENT (773-8368)
§  STD Hotline: 1-800–227-8922
§  Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-TALK (8255)
§  Suicide & Crisis Hotline:1-800-999-9999
§  Suicide Prevention – Trevor HelpLine (Specializing in Gay & Lesbian Youth) 1-800-850-8078
§  Teen Helpline: 1-800-400-0900
§  Victim Center: 1-800-FYI-CALL (1-800-394-2255)
§  Youth Crisis Hotline: 1-800-HIT-HOME (448-4663)



Wednesday, November 11, 2015

Hey, what's up, hello!

Argggghhhhh!

You ever have that feeling that your life is just a real game of wack-a-mole? I know I've been MIA for quite some time now. It's been hard to write. And I'm sorry that my first time back is a bitch and moan post. I've been fighting for my right to live, these past few months. Ok so it's not really that dramatic. I have been going months of being undermedicated because my insurance company has been refusing to cover the meds that my rheumatologist wants me to have.

Check this routine that I've been on since June. The doctor that has known me for over 11 years writes a script. The script goes to my insurance company. (Now at this time let it be known I have a very well known, nationally recognized insurance provider. It's not something fly by the seat of your pants, late night commercial scam company.) The insurance company denies me coverage on the script. They prefer me to try a cheaper med, that I've tried in the past (I had a horrible reaction to it. It wrecked my body.) But it was awhile ago and insurance feels I may not have the same reaction to it. My doctor petitions the insurance company to accept the script. We wait. And...they refuse.*whack-a-mole* So my doctor researches and tries another script. It goes to the insurance company. They deny the script. Doctor petitions the insurance company. We wait...they refuse. *whack-a-mole* So my doctor researches and tries another script. It goes to the insurance company. They deny the script. Doctor petitions the insurance company. We wait...they refuse.

 
You see the pattern here?

For four months. Four months without meds in my system to help stabilize a progressive illness. (If I'm being honest I have to put some blame about this on my doctors head too. She knows me and my body well enough to know not to do this)

You know what the insurance company doesn't have a problem approving and covering? Pain meds. Pain meds that I wouldn't need if they would cover the meds to help me not develop pain. That's fucking shameful in and of itself. But finally on the fifth try my insurance company approved a medication! *wack-a-mole* So I call the pharmacy to get everything set up and I'm informed that my insurance company has approved this medication at 100% repay. Meaning I pay for everything upfront and the company will pay me back 4-6wks later at 100%. So. How much is a one month supply of this medication? $3,988.00. Because who the fuck doesn't have $4,000 just laying around each month? *slowly raises hand*

So what now? that's right .... *Whack-a-mole*.

I contacted the drug manufacturers and applied for their underinsured program. But because I have insurance from a popular company I'm not a priority. All this time still no meds in my system other than the pain meds that they are willing to cover each month. I did eventually get approved and am now on this medication. I'm having slight reactions against it but I fought too damn hard to get it so we are just monitoring everything.
*whack-a-mole*

It's starting to build up in my system and that's a good thing. But the damage of not being properly medicated for months prior has taken it's toll. I've weakened myself to the point of last week managing to mess up my vertebrae pretty severely. *wack the next f-ing mole*

My doctors have been trying to get me to go on disability since I was 25 and I keep pushing myself to work. For a few reasons. I've worked because I enjoy working, being useful. But also to have good insurance to help cover the things I need for my illness (yeah fucked up huh?). But mostly because this...As long as I keep struggling, I'll be ok. But the moment I stop, I'll sink. But I guess at that point I'll have no more moles to whack.

 
So hopefully going forward I will have more energy and strength to be more involved with the blog. But I promise just because you may not be getting regular posts from me doesn't mean I'm not thinking about you guys and gals. And it definitely doesn't mean that I may not pop back up when you least expect me. I'm kinda like the blog version of the Spanish Inquisition.




--Golden @theonlygolden