This is Halloween ......

       EDIT : Due to my awesomeness the powers that be have decided to air the Great Pumpkin on PBS Oct. 24th at 7:30 Eastern which is of course when most families are sitting down to watch TV not rushing home or preparing dinner. Sigh ... anyway you will have the opportunity to watch this beloved special but don't always count on that ..... 

  

n    Now back to our originally scheduled shenanigans! 

       Attention fellow lovers of Halloween TV fun …….let’s get some unpleasant business out of the way first … In case you missed it last year, Peanuts anything has moved exclusively to Apple TV + and thus you won’t find our beloved Great Pumpkin on this year’s calendar, or I guess any future calendars. For the record I believe I’ve been predicting this for over a decade so I’m not going to say I told you so but ……… I mean I totes did. I was really hoping the powers that be would come to their senses and realize what a missed opportunity this was but well if they had any senses we’d have less “reboots” or “remakes” than we do flavors of Oreo’s. I was going to bore you with my reboot rant but I’m going to spare you … this time! However can we talk about how they will show say Friday the 13^th part 3, 4, 2, and then 1 ? Like that’s so messed up …. Or they will show Halloween 4 but not Halloween. What’s up with that?!

 

       That being said I’m kind of super excited about the new Child Play SERIES “Chucky’ that will be on Syfy this year starting October 12^th. However, since that’s a series and not a special it’s not on this calendar but should be, cause it looks AWESOME! …wait …where was I … oh yeah, the move of Peanuts to Apple TV+ … If you have it log on…..pull it up and enjoy … the rest of us will just grab our DVDs while we still can. For you old schoolers your VHS might need to be dusted off before you insert it but should still be good to go too. God love ya if like me you are still rocking the old school VHS machine. I myself got me a little VHS/DVD combo, when my former VCR died a horrible, horrible death after eating my copy of Monty Python and the Holy Grail, a super sad day for sure. Dad still says was a waste of money. Who is laughing now Dad ?! well….me….I guess ….. just me, but I stand by my decision that day at the Best Buy to pay a little extra for the luxury of being able to choose my format when watching goodness on my TV instead of upgrading to that Blu-Ray fad.  

 
So now that that’s taken care of ……. I present to you the 2021 Halloween Calendar. It’s back guys! I’m going to keep it going until the universe says we’ve had enough.  Or until you guys stop asking about it … in August.
 
A few items of note ….
FreeForm is doing 31 nights of Halloween – this is the place that your littles will need to land but note that just cause it’s on this channel this time of year does not mean it’s “Halloween” fun and what’s with their new alignment with Fox that allows them to show not only the Simpsons but now Family Guy as well? I do admit that at some point FreeForm tried to take over the calendar but I think I held them at bay … somewhat but good try FreeForm.

SYFY is also doing 31 days of Halloween – That’s the place to go for some fun, gory, good times!

AMC Fear Fest begins October 1^st – Classics are all over the place here with some walking dead sprinkled around for flavor. Tune in to see Pet Sematary, The Shining, Scream, all the Final Destinations, and of course the OG …. Michael Meyers in Halloween.

The Simpsons Treehouse of Horror XXXII airs on FOX on Oct. 10^th. It’s Must See TV. This year’s special will be 5 segments instead of the usual three.

TCM is trying to get back on my calendars by throwing a Halloween Marathon starting October 29^th at 7 through October 31^st. That’s 32 classic movies guys ….  Spooky, creepy, horrifying, and humorous over the course of 48 hours. This includes movies starring the likes of Vincent Price, Linda Blair, and even Mel Books in Young Frankenstein, a MUST see if you haven’t seen it. 

Food Network is still in the corner cause like last year they started most of their programing in the middle of September (cause that’s when I want to get my Halloween Wars on of course). They slightly redeem themselves by bringing back “Outrageous Pumpkins” with Alyson Hannigan starting Oct. 3^rd and airing every Sunday at 9 and Kids Baking Championship “Oh My Gourd!” (Seriously get in the corner Food Network and likely make a nest you are going to be there for a while). KBC OMG (which is truly what they are calling it btw) will air Monday at 7 starting Oct. 18^th. I’m not even going to rant about the fact that Halloween Wars removed the “pumpkin” aspect of the show and how the host is only appearing via prerecorded videos .. I mean just cancel the damn thing already and put it out of its misery.

There is also exciting news on the “streaming” front …… Disney+ will have a new “Lego Star Wars” called “Terrifying Tales” or something like that but the real exciting news is that they will be debuting the “Muppets Haunted Mansion” on Oct 8th. Peacock will be showing the brand-new Halloween Movie “Halloween Kills” starting Oct. 15^th will Jamie finally kill him or nah … my guess is nah but I’m thankful for Universal and Peacock for making this happen. Peacock will also air a “Snoop and Martha’s Very Tasty Halloween” starting Oct. 14^th and if that’s not worth getting Peacock well nothing is. Peacock is free yall …. Go get it ! Hulu is having a Huluween (seriously can’t make this stuff up) with a special Halloween section featuring both classic movies and “Halloween episodes” of favorite shows. ! Netflix has some new “specials” as well such as Sharkdog’s Fintastic Halloween, Escape the Undertaker, Scaredy Cats, and Nightbooks. All kinds of good stuff on Netflix, Hulu, Prime, Disney+, Peacock and *cough* AppleTV+ this year … plus some amazing classics so check em out. 

Hallmark – Hallmark is doing some “Fall Harvest” thing with some “new” movies so I threw them on the calendar if only cause Freeform was taking over. Might be a good fall alternative to gruesome and scary, or a mind-numbing bore to fall asleep to after a stressful workday.  

As this is the 12th (give or take) year of doing this …. I’m not going to bore you with the rules …. Just know ….. If your kid is easily skittish and couldn’t sleep after watching say Texas Chainsaw Massacre don’t blame me … as some have done in the past, it’s not my problem. I’m in the Central time zone, if you aren’t then adjust accordingly. Check your own listings as yes sometimes I make mistakes and conversion from Eastern Time Zone is hard yall.
 
The intention of this calendar is to get your family to pause and spend some time together making memories. Maybe carve a pumpkin while watching, create some fantastic Halloween Treats from your various Social Media sites, or work on your costume – don’t forget the props - and RELAX with your family, friends and loved ones (sometimes those overlap). This years must see special will be next year’s Peanuts only available via streaming if we aren’t careful ….. so, let’s not let that happen again. 

       **NOTE ** if you save the image below it will not be cut off, but if I share it as "normal" it makes it really small and basically unreadable. 

 
So, sit back, scare yourself, and have a GREAT Halloween! It’s fall people enjoy it!
 
Marcy 

2020 Halloween TV Movie Calendar

Let’s be honest … 2020 is very much like the big bad wolf … it blew in super hard but then was told it couldn’t cause it might spread the COVID, and good lord man wear a mask! I came really close to not doing this calendar cause well frankly nothing else has worked out this year why should this … but then decided A. I needed something to look forward to so looking up these shows and movies made me happy. B. what if the thing you guys was looking forward to was this calendar and I didn’t deliver then it would have just been one more thing in this crappy year that disappointed you … and well I can’t have that on my head. C. it’s all about me and this calendar makes me smile and wears out my Tivo and so we must proceed!

So … here you go …. By my calculations the 12^th Edition of the Halloween Calendar is here for your viewing pleasure, tho I swear I’ve been doing it longer. Found below is a JPEG (for your phone for quick reviews of shows on the go). If you'd like a PDF of it drop me a DM on my twitter @beaslma

PS I have found that when you are at a restaurant or sports bar pulling our your phone and asking the waitress to switch from the football game to SYFY for some Halloween goodness does not win you a free appetizer but then again this year it just might.

While I have put my toe into the “digital world” by using Disney Plus, Amazon Prime, Peacock, and by having access to Netflix (thanks to someone who shall remain nameless so that the Netflix gods don’t come after her), I have to admit my main source of entertainment is still my television and thus this calendar reflects that, so deal with it digital nerds! Wait … wait don’t go ….. digital shows are highlighted below just not in the same loving way …. Don’t turn your back on me pls…totes love ya.

The highlights:

• Freeform: ok let’s get the obvious out of the way, if you read nothing else in this dissertation …. Read this ……. if you have littles this is the channel for you. If you are young at heart …. this is the channel for you. If you are having a horrible day and just want to vege and watch something fun …. this is the channel for you. That being said not everything on their list deserves or needs your eye balls. 31 Nights of Halloween started many years ago and quickly grew to be competitive in this market. That said … the line-up includes a LOT of repeats and frankly shows that have very little to do with Halloween. It also includes shows/movies that you won’t find elsewhere so it’s well worth checking out and checking out often.
• AMC: I would call Fear Fest the greatest thing to ever happen to Halloween IF they didn’t insist on so much Walking Dead insanity I mean aren’t all those people Zombies yet…honestly how is that show still on the air? Is it even a story at this point or are they all just killing one another for lack of having something better to do?! They redeem themselves a little bit by their selection, which starts Oct. 1^st and runs through the end of the month … but only a little bit. I’m watching you AMC don’t turn into Food Network (see below).
• Syfy: is once again doing their 31 days of Halloween, starting Oct. 1^st with all the blood and gore and awesomeness that one could wish for in a Halloween line up. I am going to ignore the fact they have added Harry Potter to their lineup cause I just don’t have it in me to rant about that yet again, nor do I feel the need to point out that Gremlins is a Christmas movie cause a friend has already pointed that out to me and I don’t entirely disagree. However Gizmo’s are adorable and we all need more of that in our lives. 
• Disney Channel: Disney’s Monstober starts October 1^st but let’s be honest it’s more Disney Channel Halloween themed episodes than anything else and that’s disappointing to me. With all that is at their disposal, cause let’s face it I’ve seen what they have in their arsenal on the Disney+ ap, the best they can come up with is Descendants, Disney Fan Jam, it’s just real disappointing but hey what do I know those could be the classics that your kids will one day be ranting to their peers about.
• Turner Classic Movies: The Godfather of classic movies will begin their programing on Oct. 2^nd and include original classics like Dracula, House on Haunted Hill, Creature from the Black Lagoon, The Devil Doll, The Mummy, The Blob, so many great movies this year on their schedule, if you are lucky enough to get this channel of course.
• It’s the Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown  - ok look we all know ABC is gonna show it, usually the Wed before Halloween but for some reason the powers that be at ABC feel the need to keep that crap under wraps for as long as they can. I get it … you have a pandemic going on and your fall schedules have been messed with cause your actors and writers and their staffs didn’t wanna die by coming in to film so you are all scrambling. Maybe announce this one … check one thing off the to do list ….. would that be so hard? It is like they don’t even care about my calendar. So rude.

You might notice that Food Network isn’t on this list, and usually they are. However this year I’m mad at them. They started showing their Halloween fun in SEPTEMBER … like what?! Who do they think they are Christmas at Walmart in August ?! Unacceptable. Who do they think they are Christmas at Walmart in August ?! Unacceptable. I will admit that Outrageous Pumpkins with Alyson Hannigan (of Buffy and How I met your mother fame) is giving me life at the moment but not enough to earn them back their bullet. Nice try Food Network but frankly, the last few years they have angered me with their content and this year they have angered me by showing that horrible content so early. That’s right … Halloween Wars aint what it used to be. You may be wondering to yourself ... why would they start showing this stuff so early ….. to make room for a “Halloween Edition” of Worst Cooks, and some show called Freakshow Cakes. So watch Food Network or don’t … entirely up to you. Get in the corner Food Network and think about what you have done!

So ok …. Digital Nerds as I so lovely called you guys earlier (still with me?) here’s your moment to shine ……  cause I love you guys …… here’s some links for your favorite digital platforms like Netflix, Disney+, Amazon Prime. Use some of these btw to look for those shows we all grew up with and fall back in love with them, like Halloween Town, any of the Olsen Twins stuff like Double Double Toil and Trouble, Young Frankenstein, Scary Stories, Little Shop of Horrors, Twitches, Spooky Buddies, Bednobs and Broomsticks, Donald Ducks Trick or Treat, and of course The Adventures of Ichabod and Mr. Toad a classic for sure.

Check out the following links to see their various line ups that you shouldn’t miss. DISCLAIMER: I have seen some of these but not all of these … I vouch not for their goodness, their quality or their creativity but I do vouch for the fact that they carry the Halloween torch and that’s good enough for me. 

https://www.gamespot.com/articles/new-to-netflix-in-october-2020-bly-manor-and-more-horror-movies-tv-shows-and-original/1100-6482549/

https://comicbook.com/movies/news/disney-plus-halloween-collection-streaming-movies-list-2020/

https://www.countryliving.com/life/entertainment/g32748070/disney-plus-halloween-movies/

https://collider.com/best-halloween-movies-on-amazon-prime/

One thing that never changes is of course … the rules … I’ve told you about the kid who watched Michael Myers and couldn’t sleep and his mom had the audacity to blame me (don’t do that, he did not and does not have my DNA which means …. He’s not my problem…good luck with what you created), I’ve told you about time zones (I’m in Central, if you aren’t adjust accordingly) and font sizes (printing it 11X 17 is good for your eye holes), so I’m not going to bore you with those again. If you don’t want this calendar feel free to opt out …. Reply all will not be your friend …. Just giving you a heads up. For the newbies figure it out, for the veterans to this calendar game anyone want to make a bet on who breaks the first rule and which one?! Can they break a rule if I haven’t told them what the rule is ? Yeah…yeah they can and they likely will. 

The intention of this calendar, much like the Christmas one is well normally to get you to slow down and spend time with your family, friends and loved ones (which sometimes overlap) but I’d imagine you all might be sick of that. So take some time for your self do something fun … carve a pumpkin while watching, create fantastic Halloween snacks to eat while watching, or work on your costume – don’t forget the props – and RELAX from the horrors that have been 2020 cause let’s face it trick or treating might be cancelled but awesome Halloween specials are always in season. Feel free to share ……. If you dare! 😃

Marcy

Have you enjoyed October ?

I know .... I know .... we suck. It's been a while since we posted but it's October, my favorite time of the year, and my waking minutes not spent working have been spent watching some horror movie awesomeness.

Some of my favorites have included the Halloween series, but not the 3^rd one or the 1^st one that Rob Zombie did, tho I admit the 2^nd Rob Zombie Halloween IS one of my favorites. He totally tanked the first one, he even admits that so I’m not scared he’s going to come after me about that, but he redeemed himself, in my opinion, with the 2^nd one. If you haven’t seen it you totally should.

It’s been fun watching old classics again like The Shining, the Curse of Frankenstein, Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, The Little Shop of Horrors, Poltergeist, and the original Texas Chainsaw Massacre, which isn’t really a classic but a darn good movie.

It’s been fun watching old favorites too like the Addams Family, Casper, Hocus Pocus, anything by Tim Burton, Toy Story of Terror, and of course It’s the Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown. It’s not Halloween without watching it at least once, but if you can swing watching it more than once you will be happier because of it.

I do however admit I've slept through more of these movies than I'd like to admit. I remember as a child being terrified by some of these movies, staying up late at night cause I couldn't sleep with the image of Michael Myers burned into my head. Yet as of late I lay down to watch one of these shows/movies and I’m really into it and then boom I’m waking up and the movie is over... it’s annoying really. The question is am I falling asleep cause they are boring now or am I falling asleep after a long day and it’s totally justified. Either way I don't like it!

For the record it’s not just movies, I’ve fallen asleep or struggled to stay awake for hour long dramas, or crappy “terror” related shows like Scream Queens on Fox, or American Horror Story Hotel on FX. I just can’t with either of those shows. I gave up on Scream Queens about 3 episodes in. It wasn’t entertaining, it wasn’t cleaver, it wasn’t something I wanted to be a part of, and when it first started I totally wanted to be a part of it. I wanted it to be good. I’m about an episode away from giving up on AHS too because it’s just … well gross. It’s not scary, it’s not even something that makes me jump, I spend most of the episode thinking well that’s not how something like that would happen or thinking about how many diseases must be spread in that hotel on a daily basis.

It's not even sexy, which is sadly what I think they are going for, it’s just … gross. I will however say that Lady Gaga has impressed the heck out of me. I am not a fan of her music, but it’s cause I don’t like repetitive music and her songs seem to be 6-8 lyrics repeated over and over and again to a technoish beat. I just can’t with that kind of music, it makes my brain feel it will seep out of my ear, and frankly I like my brain where it is at the moment, so I'll pass. I admit it .... My name is Marcy and I'll never be a club kid. However I admit that LG has embodied the character she has been given and you have to give her credit for that.

I hope you have all enjoyed your October found some new moves/shows to enjoy and took some time to enjoy the good weather with your family if not there’s still time. Go carve a pumpkin, go on a walk, watch some good TV and relax, that’s what this time of the year is all about.

PS we are going to get back to posting more frequent, we may even attempt the 27 days of thankfulness again, tho I make no promises. I do wish we could get some chatter going on this blog, otherwise it becomes more of a diary that isn’t really about me and that seems to be stilly. So join us …. Let us know you are out there.

-Marcy

Fall is my happy place!!!

There is one time of year for which, I can't wait. It’s a time of year which puts me in the greatest of moods no matter what is thrown my way. It’s like I see the world through a "Happiness" filter and it is awesome! If you ask people what their favorite holiday most say Christmas, Thanksgiving, Halloween or even their birthday, which can totally be a holiday if you do it right. You may even get the occasional freak that says Presidents Day, although I don't know why the fuck they would, but it takes all people I guess.

If one were to ask me, and I can’t help but notice no one has yet …. Despite my lead up opening the door for people to ask, my answer is always October 1-January 2. That’s right I'm such a fucking cheater!

 

My favorite holiday begins with Fall. It's mystical! The night comes earlier. The colors of Mother Nature go all gold, orange, red and brown. The wind carries the sound of fallen leaves. The world smells all smokey and crisp. It's wonderful.

So to recap … I love Fall! I can finally pull out my sweaters, which I'm pretty sure I have 42 different styles. BTW for those of you keeping score at home, 42 is the answer to the most important question in the universe AND the amount of sweaters one person can own before beginning fashion rehab. Plus if you are a horror junkie like me you can get your fill. All the scary movies are coming out in theatres, television is rocking cheesy edited for TV horror movies and Halloween programming, and there are haunted houses on each corner. Seriously did you see Marcy’s rocking Halloween calendar that was posted on Oct. 1^st? She says she does that for her and her nephews but it’s really for me! IT’s ABOUT ME PEOPLE!!!!

Even the food changes in fall. I am currently craving candied apples! The problem is they aren't that easy to come across. Right now I could get one at the fair. They just pulled into town, another fall tradition. But I don't do the “county fair.” They are run by carnies. Carnies can kidnap you, kill you, hide you in one of their refrigerated trucks and drop your dead ass on any back road in the U.S. So that's out. Sigh …. don’t worry tho reader I will find me a candied apple. Oh yes, it will be mine, and it will be delicious, and messy I will also make a giant mess with it but it will be worth the wait.

 

So for the next little bit I'm sure I will have more than a few of my upcoming posts be fall related, and I'm sorry. No I’m not … I can’t help it. To me it's when Nature shows off and I just can't help but bask in her glory so get outside and enjoy the show!

-Golden @theonlygolden