Visiting Golden .. Missing Golden …. VBS

This time last week I had made the 4 hour drive (that I can make in 3 …. Beating my GPS estimated time is my favorite thing to do …. Just saying) to Golden’s house for the final part of the #MonthLongCelebrationofGolden a hang in person with one of my favorite people on this planet. One of the best parts of the trip was finally getting to meet my new fur-niece Mighty, whom I’m not convinced knows her name but is still pretty freaking adorable.

I mean really … look at her … how would you yell at her? Golden and I haven’t figured it out yet cause you tell her something and she looks at you like a little stuffed animal and suddenly you forget why you are angry …. That’s her super power.

Last Friday we met up with Marible and got some dinner, some adult beverages, and saw Guardian’s of the Galaxy Volume 2. I admit I enjoyed the 2^nd one better than the first but I don’t know that either are movies I want to watch over and over again. My favorite part is the beginning of the movie where Baby Groot (possibly a close 2^nd to the cutest thing on the planet – of course Mighty is #1 in that category) dances around without any care in the world while everyone tries to keep him from dying.

That’s actually in the first 10 minutes so there you go read into that what you want. Then we came back to Golden’s where Marible left her phone in my car which led to the stupidest moment of my life. I found Marible’s phone and immediately said “You need to call her and tell her we have her phone!” Golden looked at me and said… “Really?!” I was like, “yeah I don’t have her number!” she looks at me and says “think about this for a second….” I will not disclose how long it took me to understand why none of this made sense. It was funny that Golden then tweeted Marible to tell her we had the phone and we also called her dad. She eventually came back and we gave her the phone and the problem was solved but I felt like a major idiot. It was not my best moment.

Then on Saturday at the crack of dawn we got up for the Annual trip to the Birmingham Zoo. A Birthday tradition for Golden, one that I’m happy to be a part of even if it was crazy hot. We got to ride the train, see all the animals, spend time with the family, and have a nice relaxing day getting some exercise. It was a fun day, a LONG day but a fun one. I think we were both asleep by 9. We are not nearly as young as we used to be. Sunday we did a whole lot of nothing and it was everything I’ve ever dreamed that it  could be. We watched Dr. Strange, a movie I hadn’t seen before but wanted to. Then watched several episodes of Wynonna Earp which I liked by was really taken aback by  how careless she was with her “peacemaker” when it’s the one thing between her and well her being dead. I can see myself watching the upcoming season, I’ll need to watch the rest of last season but I think it’s one of those shows that I’d be ok if I didn’t get to watch the episodes I’ve missed.

On Monday we had breakfast with Golden’s parents before I headed south. Leaving is always hard not cause she and I don’t talk throughout the week but because I don’t get up there nearly as much as I should not to mention that drive home. While I can do it in 3 it’s still a lllooonnnngggg drive which eats up a good part of the day. Again, I ask ... where the hell is my portal to other places science … I mean seriously get on that … what are you even working on!!!!!

So that was my Memorial Day weekend …. It was a good weekend but this “short week” felt really long. Next on my agenda is getting ready for the Church’s Vacation Bible School in which yours truly will be leading the “science” section of the night. I’ll keep you posted as I start to prep for the 4 day event … I’ll admit I’m really nervious about it. I’ve participated in VBS before but never “led” a section of it. When we joined our new church I decided I was going to get more involved and so far that’s what I have done. I’m scared to death I’m going to make a fool out of myself. The theme however is “Super Heroes” so at least it’s an area I’m familiar with.

Have a great weekend everyone!

Marcy

New Year….Fresh Start …..kind of

So I started this post about 12 times and it never sounded right to me and so I deleted it. I do that a lot. I write up this long post that’s supposed to be filled with humor, insight, and a message of some kind then I reread it and go … yeah that’s dumb so I delete it.

I was telling a friend the other day, no one is reading this thing so why is it so hard to write on it? What is holding me back? It’s not like I care if anyone is reading, frankly I’d like to think that you all had better things to do, (please don’t go!) but it would be nice to know someone was interested in my thoughts even if they are a jumbled crazy mess sometimes.

Now I realize that without posting these crazy random thoughts people have the option of rejecting or embracing my thoughts so that’s where I come in. I need to post these thoughts and see where the chips fall. You’d think not having an audience it would be easier to throw random things up on this thing and see what happens. However it’s not that easy.  This blog, writing in general used to be something that made me smile, made me reflective, and yes in some instances cry like a small child. I often wonder what happened.

I don’t want this to be another post where I tell you that more posts are coming, so I’m not going to go there. What I am going to try to do is strive to post even when I think they are silly or stupid or jumbled and dumb and force myself to write something even if it’s only once a month. Cause I’ve gotten lazy in so many aspects of my life, cleaning seems to be non-existent, there’s a Christmas present I’ve been meaning to mail since mid Dec still sitting unwrapped on my floor, and sadly I’ve checked my work e-mail more times on this holiday than I’d like to admit.

So … here’s my obligatory New Year’s Resolution post, but instead of calling it that I’m going to call it things I’d like to change about 2016.

1.     I’d like to see more movies not just say wow that looks good I should go see that then never go see it. That was on my list last year and it was an EPIC fail but this year I’m going to really try to make this more of a priority

2.     I’d like to spend more time actually TALKING to Golden not texting. Our different work schedules haven’t allowed for a 2 or 3 hour gab fest lately and I hope that changes. I miss our talks, she makes me laugh harder than any human on earth.

3.     I’d like to visit Golden more than once a year, it’s just not enough. I want more farting around time with her, more fun in our lives. I think we both need it, oh and her cheeseball. I really really really want a cheeseball. Sure I could make my own and have on a few occasions but hers are better. If nothing else i'm going to the Damn Zoo this year!!!! Mark it in your calendar! Nothing is going to stand in my way this year! NOTHING!!!!  

4.     I’d like to lose some weight, which would require me to be less of a slug. At the end of a long work day I’m just spent and don’t want to move, and on the weekends I think this is my only down time so I want to just lay here and do nothing cause Monday will be here soon !

5.     I’d like to exercise more, even if it’s just walking around the block to clear my head. Again my issue becomes that by the time I get home it’s 7, then I eat dinner and it’s late and so I don’t do it. Maybe I can come up with a plan for this. I already get up at the crack of dawn maybe 30 minutes at the start of my day would be good, then again 30 more minutes in my bed would be nice too.

6.     I’d like work to not be all consuming of my energy. Last year was INSANE work wise. I won’t bore you but know I took a total of 4 days off all year and most of that was spent at DragonCon. I know my boss wants me to take more time and he’s going to try and make it so that I don’t feel I’m carrying the weight of my dept on my shoulders, we’ll see how that works out for me. The last 2 weeks haven’t been any indication of a change but hey it’s a new year and I got a Christmas Bonus for those efforts so …. Yippie!

7.     I want to spend my money on things that make me smile more. Fun goofy things that I don’t really need but I want and not feel guilty about it. I work hard and deserve to play hard too … right?!

8.     I want to go to more concerts/shows/life events this year. I am tired of reading about everyone else having these epic memories. That also requires me to get out of my comfort zone a bit as the world has become a really scary place.

9.     I also hope for more music from some of my new favorite artist, Maddie and Tae, Haley and Michaels, The Springs, etc., I’m ready for the world to find out about them cause they are that good. Maddie and Tae got 2015 but there’s room on my radio for all of them. Come on Country Music make it happen.

10.  Speaking of Haley and Michaels I want to finish my story that I started a while back, if only cause I think Shannon and Ryan deserve to get out of that Airport :D That’s a big goal of mine for the next month or so. Ha!

So there you have it.

None of these are really promises or things that will change the world but things I felt you needed to know. We’ll talk more soon I’m sure, in the meantime have a fantastic 2016 filled with good times and few Butt Slams ... that's right I'm trying to bring that back.

-marcy (@beaslma)

My Birthmonth is coming....

May is my birthmonth! It's that time of year again, kiddos! That magical time of year where I act like a self indulgent ass for 31+ days!

My BIRTHMONTH IS ALMOST HERE !!!!

YAYYYYYYYY

 

My actual birthday isn't until May 31st but I begin my celebration on May 1st. Well May 1st if y'all are lucky. Sometimes it's leaked into April by a day or two. I've been observing my birthmonth for years now, but I've noticed the past couple of years that more and more people are recognizing not just their birthday but their birthweek and/or their birthmonth. Is it because I started this trend?

I mean, probably.

Ok. Honestly, probably not. It's probably because it seems that in today's society we all think we are each special and important and deserve all the attention. We are each little special snowflakes. Is this why I celebrate my birthmonth?

Not entirely.

It has turned into kind of a self indulgent joke. A way for my family, friends and I to take a serious situation & make it easier to swallow. Not too long out of high school I began to display strange health problems. I was in college at the time and spent alot of time in and out of doctors, specialists, and hospitals. At times I would go to classes through the week drive to Birmingham on the weekends to be admitted for testing sign out and drive 3hours back to college. Thinking about how I had to handle somethings then medically, really makes me realize how far we have come with our medical system. Sometimes (although rarely) I could get a doctor to issue a labwork order to a local doctor so I wouldn't have to drive for blood work. I even went into the university clinic to get labs drawn but before I could produce my medical order the local campus security had me restrained and handcuffed because Gomer fucking Pyle mistook my constantly bruised and needle beaten arms for drug track marks. From that point on I was too embarrassed and so made the drive every weekend. I was tested for anything and everything they could think to test for, by so many doctors and specialists that I soon lost count. They couldn't tell me what I had, only what I didn't have. Fucking helpful, I know. It was stressful, painful, scary and expensive. I began assembling my medical team of doctors. And after months and months and months of tests (routine and experimental) the only thing they were positive of was that my life span was limited. Me and my family were told I would be in a wheelchair by 25 and I "wouldn't live to see a 30th birthday".

I think my mom handled it the hardest. Everything became a potential "last memory". At this point it's probably important for you to know I HATE having my picture taken. Absolutely HATE! With all the fires of hell. But my mom felt that she need document every damn thing. We had to have cheesy ass pictures made because what if it was the last time she had a picture of the whole family? What if this was the last time you have an Christmas walking? What if this is the last time you and your brother are able to stand next to each other? What if this is your last birthday?

For the next few years as my health ebbed and flowed, my birthday became dreaded because it was one less year we were able to have together. My days were numbered and a team of extremely well educated and highly paid medical professionals had stamped me with an expiration date.

And fucking frankly I got tired of it.

So instead I revolted!

VIVA LA REVOLUCIÓN!

If it was going to be be my last, I was damn well going to enjoy it. Pack as much fun, as many activities and as many parties as possible into my day. Which quickly began to spread into days, weeks and then all month. Instead of having my mom cry for days leading up to it, I started calling her on May 1st, "Its the first day of my birthmonth, tell me happy birthday! Let's go buy something frivolous & eat cake!" May 2nd, call mom.. "it's the second day of my birthmonth! Tell me happy birthday! Let's go have our nails done!" And so on and so on. When my brother & his wife had kids mom wanted me to be able to make as many memories as possible with them, in case one day it was all they had left to know me by. So I started making my whole family (and Marcy whenever possible) go with me to the zoo for my birthday weekend.

Why the zoo?

Because I fucking love the zoo, that's why!

All this celebrating didn't really keep my family and friends from silently dreading my inevitable impending death but it did kind of create a way for them to deal with it. And it provided me the opportunity to instead of fearing death to celebrate life.

My body breaks down, tears up and at times absolutely was worthless. But meds and stubbornness are amazing bedfellows. 25 came and I wasn't wheelchair bound! So that birthday was a celebration! As 30 approached we celebrated harder each year because it was likely to be my last birthday. The year between 29 & 30 was like waiting any moment to fall over dead. But contrary to the expensive over paid, overly educated medical professionals I did reach the 30th birthday! And an entire group of people let out a collective breath that nobody was willing to admit we had been holding.

Since then, each birthday I have has turned from a sad potentially last ever, to a celebratory 'we made it' month long party. There are days that I feel like I can barely contain the pain within me and there are days that I barely have pain. But whichever day I'm having, I have surpassed my life expectancy. And that's worth celebrating.

So when it comes to my birthday I tend to go overboard. If you know me personally or follow me on social media, I am so sorry for my dumb ass self indulgence. It helps me and mine deal with serious life issues, but that doesn't mean that we can't celebrate. I can dance so I'm going to and I want everyone I know to join in. So until we all get sick and can't stand any more let's eat cake and celebrate!

Happy Birthmonth to Me!

-golden (@theonlygolden)

Ps-if you don't mind some goofy silliness please feel free to follow me on twitter for my birthmonth celebration and join in the revelry!